Online Dating

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To the Other Woman, Karma is a B****

 

Taking someone else’s man may feel good to your ego, but just know that your days are numbered.  What goes around comes around!  The other woman is often insecure and have trust issues.  A man who cheats on one woman, is inclined to cheat on the one he cheated with.   He may trade her in for another woman when he gets bored.   A man may also feel that his lover doesn’t have any morals and values, so she may be the one who cheats.  Since he already has a wife or girlfriend, she wouldn’t really be cheating on him. (LOL)

A man doesn’t usually marry his mistress.  She continues to hang on waiting in the background, while he often never leaves his wife.  She doesn’t realize she’s nothing more to him than his “side chick.” Even when a married man says he’s not sleeping with his wife, he usually is.

The other woman isn’t the one who took the vows of fidelity the married man is, but she is an enabler or accomplice to the cheater.  The married man is the one who betrayed you.   She is only hurting herself by denying herself a chance at having a respectable relationship.

Some things to keep in mind when you are the other woman:

  1.  You are sharing a man.
  2.  You are always kept a secret.
  3.  You are settling for less wasting your time with someone who is not available, when you deserve so much more.
  4.  You may have many lonely nights and holidays, because he can’t slip away.
  5.  You will always be second to his wife and children.

Trust is always questionable when you have a cheater and a home wrecker.

Just remember, how you get a man is how you’ll lose him.  Karma is a bitch!!

 

 

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Men: What You See, is What You Get

 

Most men are true to who they are, even early on in a relationship.  Many women will overlook or accept a man’s annoying behavior hoping to change him to make him into her fantasy.  The fact is, you can’t change a man unless he is willing to change, so stop trying!  He may attempt to change for you, but it won’t last.

Women often try to mold a man to become who she wants him to be.  Men will resent that they aren’t good enough as they are.  A man’s ego can become bruised.  He may feel insecure or feel emasculated.  This will definitely destroy a relationship or cause him to cheat.  You can’t raise or train a grown man.  Sometimes a man will see you as trying to control him.  He will remain resistant and may also feel that you don’t really love him.  Some other woman will gladly accept him as he is.

Some of the most difficult changes for anyone to make immediately are overcoming:

  • Addiction
  • Immaturity
  • Workaholic
  • Womanizer
  • Abusive behavior
  • Commitment phobia

Everyone has some flaws, bad habits or quirky traits that can be annoying, but are they worth accepting or are they a deal breaker? Ultimately, that is the question you have to ask yourself.

A few things to keep in mind . . .

Your love isn’t enough to change him.

You’re fighting a losing battle.

It has to be a man’s own decision to change.

Accept a man at face value.

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Don’t Be His “Beck and Call” Girl

Beck and Call Girl

 

Being too available for a man is a big mistake that many women make early on in their relationship.  It can lead to being taken for granted and you may become his back-up plan.  Some men will see a woman who waits for his call and is always available as being needy or desperate.  It’s not an attractive trait to a man.  It’s best not to always respond immediately to his text messages or phone calls.  You may appear to be waiting with the phone in your lap.

Having your own friends and interests and having an active life aside from a man will make you more interesting, less predictable and will keep his attention.  Don’t put your plans with friends on hold, hoping to hear from a man.  Never cancel your plans for a man who calls at the last-minute.  Pretend to be busy, even if you aren’t. (LOL)  It’s best to let a man know he has to confirm plans with you in advance, or you may not be available.  After all, you do have a life!   

 

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Ask Yourself, Does He Have “Potential”?

 

Every once in a while you meet a man whom you are physically attracted to and instantly connect with, but he doesn’t quite meet all of your criteria.  Instead of dismissing him stop and ask yourself, does he have potential?

Some men need a strong woman to support and encourage them. He may be the laid back type and appear to be less ambitious, but he may need a push.

You’ve heard the saying, “Behind every great man is a strong woman.” It may take some men longer to mature or to settle on a career path, but that doesn’t mean he won’t get his act together, if that’s what he has to do to be with a woman who places that expectation upon him.

As long as the pros, out-weigh the cons and there’s chemistry and compatibility the rest can fall into place. There’s not a perfect man or woman out there, but there may be one that is perfect for you if you give it a chance to develop into its full potential.

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Keep Yourself Market Ready

Love - Keep Yourself Market Ready2

 

Whether a woman is single, in a relationship or a marriage, she should always keep herself up (her hair, body, fashion, make up).   Her man will continue to see his bae as the sexy woman he fell in love with.  He will also notice other men are eyeing her too.

There is nothing worse than breaking up and having to work so hard at losing weight, getting your sexy back and building your confidence again in order to get yourself back on the dating scene.

Women who slay can rebound much faster and their confidence remains intact after a breakup.  Keeping yourself put together at all times is attractive to men.  They see a woman who is confident and loves herself.  Putting your man and your children first and neglecting yourself, is a sure way to get your man to lose interest and desire for you.  Women who get stuck into the wifey and baby mama or superwoman mode, may inadvertently cause their men to stray.  These women are often taken for granted and are no longer being romanced by their men.

When you keep yourself market ready, your man will want to do date night to take you out and show you off.  What man doesn’t desire some good arm candy?  She keeps his lust for her alive.  Every woman should want to be the best version of herself.  It’s easier to keep up the glam when she is doing it for herself, and not just for a man.

 

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Women Shouldn’t Lead With Their Curves, If They Want to be Taken Seriously

love - sex women3

 

When a woman first meet a man if she flaunts her sex appeal by dressing too provocative or revealing, a man will see her as an easy score.  Men place women in categories almost immediately.  A man may think of her as loose and only as a booty call or a friend with benefits.  She won’t be taken seriously by him.  She definitely won’t be the one he’ll take home to meet his mother or someone he will see himself in a serious relationship with.

Most men still judge women just as harshly as they did years ago.  A woman’s appearance,  body language and the way she carries herself can cause her to be labeled in a negative way.

Tasteful flirting in a lady-like manner, is as assertive as a woman she be in initiating contact with a man.  Being too aggressive with a stranger could be risky behavior.  Some men believe an aggressive woman will come on to any man that she is attracted to.  He won’t think she only approached him because he’s special.  Just like when a woman sleeps with a man too soon, he feels she does this with every man she meets, which may not always be the case.

When a man gets a woman in bed too quickly, and he hasn’t had the time to get to know her, there’s no other reason for him to come back, but for more sex.  He doesn’t feel the need to get to know YOU at this point.  Remember, every man’s goal is to “hit it”.

First impressions are lasting impressions, so don’t ruin your chances of being taken seriously by behaving in a way that you will be thought of only as a “good-time girl.”

 

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On a Date, Who Should Pay?

love - who pays on a date

 

When you’re on a date, the person who asks for the date is generally the person who pays the check whether it’s the man or the woman.  If you want to contribute, you could offer to pay the tip.  A gentleman may pay the bill regardless, but he isn’t obligated to pay.

It’s not being considerate if you purposely pick the most expensive restaurant and order the most expensive items on the menu or order several drinks without your date asking you if you would like to order another drink.  It may backfire on you.  You may not get a second date. (LOL)  If you’ve been dating for a while and are considered to be in a relationship, then it’s normal that either of you pay for the meals on a date.

When a man asks you to go out with him, if he intents for you to pay or split the check, that conversation should always take place before you go out.  This way you can agree to or cancel the date.  I feel going “dutch” on a first date isn’t worth your time!  You’re better off going out with your girlfriends instead.  If a woman starts out paying for the dates, then she will be expected to continue to do so. On a first date, I feel it’s best to let the man select the restaurant because it will tell you something about his character (whether he’s cheap or not trying to impress you).  If a man feels that he doesn’t want to spend his money on a date with someone he may not have  chemistry and attraction with, then he should always have first dates at coffee shops or happy hours.

Tip:  Always google the restaurant in advance to have an idea of the place you are going and confirm your date the day before.  If you’re not comfortable with the place or the location, cancel the date and lose his number.  If the first date isn’t impressive, it will only go downhill from there.

 

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Opposites Attract or Do They?

Love is perfect with you

In relationships, opposites often are attracted to each other.  They can make a good balance and bring excitement and intrigue to the relationship.  It would require some compromise though since they may have different views in many areas.  If they have drastically different personalities, that could pose a problem when it comes to values and decision-making.  It could also become a power struggle if they are both alphas.  Aggressive people are usually attracted to passive partners.  Couples with very similar personalities usually will get along well, since they may agree on most things.  It would be a safe option to select a person with a similar personality, habits and values, rather than the opposite.

Have you ever wondered why good girls are attracted to bad boys?  It’s the mystery, excitement and the challenge that they bring, being the opposite of themselves.  In friendships opposites would be a good mix, while in a marriage opposites could become a challenge if a couple isn’t able to compromise and respect their differences.

There are some good qualities that opposites can bring to a relationship.  Their different experiences and views may contribute to an open-minded and well-rounded couple.  The qualities one person possess that the other don’t, could actually benefit the relationship.  There may be instances where you will have to come to a middle ground whenever you don’t see eye-to-eye.  If a person has never dated their opposite, it may be worth trying something different just for a change and see where it goes.

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Don’t Just Date Your “Type”

love-man-and-a-woman

 

Some women tend to have a specific type of man who she’s attracted to and she doesn’t have any interest in any other man who doesn’t fit into her “type”.  It’s a good idea not to place limitations on available men out there that you could meet.  You may just miss out on a great guy that you’re overlooking or ruling him out because he doesn’t fit your physical or professional type.  These men could be someone you cross paths with everyday;  a close male friend, a coworker or someone you’ve known for years, maybe even someone you placed in  the “friend zone”.

He may not be tall, dark and handsome, have swag, have a successful career or be the man every woman desires, but he may have other meaningful qualities that you’re also looking for, but can’t seem to find in your usual “type”.  Qualities like character, personality, integrity, honesty, stability, maturity and loyalty, just to name a few.

Continue reading →

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Why Women Should Date Multiple Men

love-hearts

 

I’m going to start by saying it’s about dating multiple men, not sleeping with multiple partners.  Dating several men at the same time will give you a chance to explore your options while comparing your dates for the qualities that you’re looking for.  You will also be able to see who sparks your interest, compatibility and chemistry.  Perhaps dating someone other than your “type”, may be worth trying.

The more men you date, the greater the chance for you to find the one that is right for you.  It will help to prevent you from settling.  It isn’t necessary for you to disclose to your dates that you’re dating other people.  If you’re not in a serious relationship, then you don’t have anyone to answer to.  You are free to date as many men as you like.  If a man asks, then you can tell him that you are exploring your options.

Sometimes we don’t really know exactly what we are looking for in a relationship.  Dating multiple people will enable you to find out what you don’t want, that’s for sure.  (LOL)