It Takes More Than Great Sex to Keep it Together

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A relationship where sex is the glue holding it together, won’t last.  You’re in bed only a minimal amount of time in a day.  If you can’t get along outside of the bedroom, then there’s not enough compatibility between the couple to sustain the relationship.

Intimacy is very important in a relationship because it bonds and connects the couple, but respect, communication, compatibility and compromise are also needed to hold it together.  A passionless relationship won’t be fulfilling when there isn’t any physical attraction or sexual chemistry.

When sexual compatibility is all you have in a relationship, the passion will fade in time and if you don’t have anything else in common, you will drift apart.  Being friends as well as being lovers may be enough for the relationship to last despite the lack of sexual chemistry.

Sex is the most important thing to most men.  Usually a man’s main focus is on sex, while a woman’s main focus is on love.  When the sex is great and the compatibility is there, generally that can be the recipe for a happy, healthy and lasting relationship.

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Men Show Love By Their Actions

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A man may not always tell you that he loves you, but his actions will show his true feelings.  Men are taught as boys to hide their feelings and emotions.  They have learned how to do that very well.  Men communicate differently than women do.  Some men won’t open up and share everything that’s on their minds or what they are feeling.  You will know how he feels about you by the way he provides and protects you.  He will do things for you without you asking him to.  A man in love will come to the rescue of the one he loves and will help out or handle a situation that he know is bothering you.

When a man chooses to spend quality time with you, instead of hanging out with the fellas, he’s showing you that he cherishes being in your company as often as he can.   A man in love will go out of his way to please the woman he’s in love with.  If he does things for you, that he hasn’t done for any other woman, you’ll know just how much you mean to him.  Other people will notice his love for you way before you do.

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Love at First Sight, Really

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When couples first meet they may like each other, have sexual chemistry and physical attraction.  This is not love at first sight.  It’s simply infatuation or sometimes lust.

When a man says it was love at first sight, he means he loves what he sees at the moment.  It’s physical and sexual attraction and chemistry, but not necessarily love.  It may or may not last once a man gets to know you.  He may not like what’s on the inside;  your personality, behavior, morals and values, etc.

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Finding “Mr. Right”

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In search of the right man, a woman has to go through the wrong men in order for her to discover what she doesn’t want in a man, and for her to be able to appreciate a good man when she gets one.  Mr. Right may not be tall, dark and handsome, successful or charming.  He may be some of the men women tend to overlook.  He may be considered nerdy or be just an average Joe, but he may be loyal, respectful, hardworking and a gentleman.  A key quality a man should possess in order to give him a second look, would be a man who has “Potential”.  He may not be well-established in his career, but he may be moving in the right direction and determined to succeed.  His ambition and drive and the support of a good woman will help him to reach his goals.  I think Mr. Right should mainly be a good man, also someone you have chemistry, compatibility and similar interests with.

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Let Him Choose You

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When meeting a man for the first time, it’s always best to let the man choose you.  You don’t have to deal with him if you aren’t interested in him, but if a woman initiates contact with a man she will never know if she is the one he really wanted.  She may not be his flavor, but he may settle for her for now rather than have a dry spell.  A man will leave you as soon as he meets the girl of his dreams, or as soon as he sleeps with you.

Some men feel that a woman who pursues a man is aggressive and desperate.  He may also think she chases men all the time.  This type of behavior may turn a man off.  A woman shouldn’t put herself out there and risk being rejected or ignored.  This would be very humiliating to a woman and a blow to her self-esteem.   Instead women should do their part by flirting with men they are interested in.  This will give a man a green light to approach you and not have to fear being rejected.  Just know, if a man doesn’t pursue you he’s not interested in you.   Never make excuses or be in denial about a man’s intentions.  A man will always find a way to let a woman know he is interested in her.  He will approach her himself or have someone other way of relaying that message to her.  A man won’t miss out on the opportunity to meet someone he’s attracted to.

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What Do You Bring to the Table?

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In a job interview, the prospective employer is trying to find out what skills you have that would make you an asset to their company.  (what you bring to the table).   It’s the same principle in a relationship, only it’s more about financial means.

There used to be a time when only women would ask a man what he has to bring to the table;  if he has a job, what his profession is, how much money he makes, etc.  Nowadays, men ask women the same questions.  Everyone wants to know the other person has something to bring to the table to enhance their lifestyle.  It could financially or emotionally.  Most men are no longer willing to carry any dead weight.  Example:  a woman who has three children by another man, and no job.  A  man may feel she doesn’t have anything to contribute.

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There’s No Such Thing As a Perfect Man

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It’s in every little girls makeup to dream of landing a “Prince Charming” as in Cinderella.  Cinderella is fiction.  The perfect man is just a fantasy.  He doesn’t exist in reality.  If a man loves you unconditionally, then one might say his love is perfect.  A man who meets most of your needs could be considered an ideal man for you.  It would be more realistic to look for a “good man” instead of a perfect man.  It’s nearly impossible to find all the qualities a woman may wish for in a man, all in one package.  Compromise may be needed, but not necessarily saying you have to settle.  Looking beyond the physical and material things could enable a woman to find a good man.  What’s on the inside of a man is what is most important.  Having respect, integrity, honesty, loyalty and kindness are all qualities of a good man.

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