Tips to Avoid “Baby Mama” Drama

Baby Mama Drama

When you’re in a relationship with a man who has a child, sometimes you can be subjected to “baby mama” drama.  If your relationship is new, you should avoid spending time with your man when he has his child present.   Here are a few tips on how to handle the drama if you’re in a serious, committed relationship or marriage:

  • Stay out of it and let the baby daddy handle all of the drama.
  • Be careful not to trash talk the baby mama in front of the child.
  • Follow the routine the parents set for the child, and don’t change anything.
  • All decisions regarding the child should be made by the parents only.
  • Remember a child’s loyalty will always be to their parents, not you.

If a baby mama still has feelings for her ex and she hasn’t moved on, she may have a problem accepting another woman being apart of her ex’s life as well as her child’s life.  Usually it’s jealousy that will cause the drama between all of you.  The child is often used as a pawn to get back at the other parent, but in reality it’s the child that suffers the most.

If you decide to stay in the relationship and deal with the baby mama drama, just know that it won’t be easy but if your love is strong, your relationship will survive.  Remember, the motive of the baby mama may just be to ruin your relationship with her ex.  Remain supportive and united and don’t let her know she is getting under your skin, or she will push harder.  Try to get along with her if possible because she will be part of your lives for many years to come.  Usually once she sees you aren’t going anywhere, she will often end the drama and accept that the three of you must coexist for the sake of the child.

 

 

Don’t Be His “Beck and Call” Girl

Beck and Call Girl

 

Being too available for a man is a big mistake that many women make early on in their relationship.  It can lead to being taken for granted and you may become his back-up plan.  Some men will see a woman who waits for his call and is always available as being needy or desperate.  It’s not an attractive trait to a man.  It’s best not to always respond immediately to his text messages or phone calls.  You may appear to be waiting with the phone in your lap.

Having your own friends and interests and having an active life aside from a man will make you more interesting, less predictable and will keep his attention.  Don’t put your plans with friends on hold, hoping to hear from a man.  Never cancel your plans for a man who calls at the last-minute.  Pretend to be busy, even if you aren’t. (LOL)  It’s best to let a man know he has to confirm plans with you in advance, or you may not be available.  After all, you do have a life!   

 

Ask Yourself, Does He Have “Potential”?

 

Every once in a while you meet a man whom you are physically attracted to and instantly connect with, but he doesn’t quite meet all of your criteria.  Instead of dismissing him stop and ask yourself, does he have potential?

Some men need a strong woman to support and encourage them. He may be the laid back type and appear to be less ambitious, but he may need a push.

You’ve heard the saying, “Behind every great man is a strong woman.” It may take some men longer to mature or to settle on a career path, but that doesn’t mean he won’t get his act together, if that’s what he has to do to be with a woman who places that expectation upon him.

As long as the pros, out-weigh the cons and there’s chemistry and compatibility the rest can fall into place. There’s not a perfect man or woman out there, but there may be one that is perfect for you if you give it a chance to develop into its full potential.

Keep Yourself Market Ready

Love - Keep Yourself Market Ready2

 

Whether a woman is single, in a relationship or a marriage, she should always keep herself up (her hair, body, fashion, make up).   Her man will continue to see his bae as the sexy woman he fell in love with.  He will also notice other men are eyeing her too.

There is nothing worse than breaking up and having to work so hard at losing weight, getting your sexy back and building your confidence again in order to get yourself back on the dating scene.

Women who slay can rebound much faster and their confidence remains intact after a breakup.  Keeping yourself put together at all times is attractive to men.  They see a woman who is confident and loves herself.  Putting your man and your children first and neglecting yourself, is a sure way to get your man to lose interest and desire for you.  Women who get stuck into the wifey and baby mama or superwoman mode, may inadvertently cause their men to stray.  These women are often taken for granted and are no longer being romanced by their men.

When you keep yourself market ready, your man will want to do date night to take you out and show you off.  What man doesn’t desire some good arm candy?  She keeps his lust for her alive.  Every woman should want to be the best version of herself.  It’s easier to keep up the glam when she is doing it for herself, and not just for a man.

 

Things a Man Won’t Tell You

love - men's secrets

 

First and foremost, a man won’t tell you what is on his mind or how he feels.  He won’t share his worries, his insecurities, jealousy or anything that may be bothering him.  A man fears he will seem weak.  Men are taught as boys to be strong at all times.

Your man won’t share negative information about his friends or family with you.  Men are much better at keeping secrets than women are.  Men don’t disclose anything about themselves, in their past or present that he is embarrassed about or uncomfortable with.  Most men won’t tell you that they cheated on all their girlfriends or their ex-wife, or that he is a former alcoholic, drug user, or that he beat his last girlfriend.

Most men won’t tell you about their adverse health conditions or that they are popping the ” little blue pill”.

Some men lust after other women, maybe even one of your girlfriends.  He knows better than to share that with you.  (LOL)

Men don’t usually tell you the moment that they fall for you or why they hate to say the words, “I love you”.  It makes them feel vulnerable.

All men hate it when their woman won’t shut up, but he usually doesn’t want to hurt her feelings by telling her.  He would rather tune her out.  A man won’t always tell his woman that he need space.  He will start pulling away from her instead.

Most men won’t tell you that he’s bored in the bedroom and wants to try something new or that he craves more sex.  He would rather get it elsewhere.

The one thing all men refuse to tell you the truth about when you ask them, is how you look in an outfit or anything regarding your appearance, whether it’s your weight, make up, hair style, etc.  They know their woman can’t handle the truth, if it’s not the answer she wants to hear from him.

Should You Tell Your Girlfriend Her Man is Cheating on Her?

 

 

Although your loyalty is always with your girlfriend, you are putting your friendship at risk when you tell your girlfriend that her man is cheating on her.  When it is her husband that’s cheating, it could turn her life upside down especially if they have children.  It would be less risky, if he is just a boyfriend.

Most women have a suspicion when their man is cheating.  Women are intuitive.  Men are so careless and they’re creatures of habit.  When a man’s regular habits/routines change drastically this is a red flag that most women pick up on right away.  Cheating is the first thing that we suspect.

When a husband is cheating on his wife, most wives already know and choose to stay with their husbands.  Many wives choose to remain in denial because they don’t want to leave him or confront him.  They want to hold on to the fairy tale that they are happy and have the perfect marriage.  By remaining in denial, their man will continue to practice some level of discretion and show some respect in hopes of her not finding out.  Once a man knows that you are aware of his infidelity, and you choose to stay with him, at this point he will continue to cheat on you throughout your relationship.  He will no longer have the fear of losing you, so he becomes less discreet and more disrespectful.  Women must realize when you confront someone about their infidelity you must be prepared to take some kind of action to let them know you will not tolerate cheating, or you’re better off pretending not to know.

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Social Media Can Ruin Relationships

Love - Social Media Ruins Relationships2

 

Putting all of your personal business out there is not good for any relationship.  Some information should be kept private between you and your man and shouldn’t even be shared with your girlfriends.  Have you noticed that couples on Reality TV have a greater risk of breaking up or divorcing?

Too many couples spend so much of their time on social media rather than spending quality time with each other.  Social media are often used for cheating purposes, connecting with random men or women or reconnecting with former lovers.  Social media can cause temptation, which could lead to infidelity.  Excessive time spent on social media sites can cause jealousy, insecurity, create distance, trust issues and conflict in a relationship. Connecting in a flirtatious way, by liking sexy photos of the opposite sex can be a sign of trouble.  Social media can become addictive just like pornography can become to some people.

You should never assume your Relationship Status without first discussing it with the other person as to where you are, and to make sure you are on the same page as far as your relationship status is concerned.  If you’re in a relationship and your man or woman refuses to change his/his status on Facebook or refuses to post photos with you together, it’s likely they are purposely excluding you to hide that they are in a relationship.  This is definitely a red flag that you shouldn’t ignore.

Constantly being distracting with our cellphones has also become more engaging than communicating with each other.  Have you ever noticed while dining in a restaurant, couples are on their phones and not talking to one another?  Couples fight over sharing passwords and pass codes all of the time.  This will certainly cause trust issues in a relationship.

While you’re connecting with others and feeling the pressure to increase the number of friends and followers you have on social media, be careful not to allow social media to cause you to disconnect from the person who should mean the most to you.  In other words, don’t let social media take over your life!

 

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