Although your loyalty is always with your girlfriend, you are putting your friendship at risk when you tell your girlfriend that her man is cheating on her. When it is her husband that’s cheating, it could turn her life upside down especially if they have children. It would be less risky, if he is just a boyfriend.
Most women have a suspicion when their man is cheating. Women are intuitive. Men are so careless and they’re creatures of habit. When a man’s regular habits/routines change drastically this is a red flag that most women pick up on right away. Cheating is the first thing that we suspect.
When a husband is cheating on his wife, most wives already know and choose to stay with their husbands. Many wives choose to remain in denial because they don’t want to leave him or confront him. They want to hold on to the fairy tale that they are happy and have the perfect marriage. By remaining in denial, their man will continue to practice some level of discretion and show some respect in hopes of her not finding out. Once a man knows that you are aware of his infidelity, and you choose to stay with him, at this point he will continue to cheat on you throughout your relationship. He will no longer have the fear of losing you, so he becomes less discreet and more disrespectful. Women must realize when you confront someone about their infidelity you must be prepared to take some kind of action to let them know you will not tolerate cheating, or you’re better off pretending not to know.
Before you tell your girlfriend about her man’s infidelity, you must be sure your girlfriend would really want to know. Most women don’t really want to know. I think it would be best to ask her hypothetically if she would want to know if her man was cheating on her. It would also be better to give her a clue or casually help her to find out on her own, without telling her directly. If you know that she won’t end the relationship, then don’t bother telling her at all. This way you don’t have to worry about jeopardizing your friendship.
If you decide to tell her about the infidelity, there’s always the risk that she may direct her anger towards you and distance herself from you. You don’t want to get caught up in the “Shoot the Messenger” scenario. Also, you should present her with proof. This is always a touchy situation to be in the middle of.